A Holiday Offering

I COME HAT IN HAND, and dripping with sincerity (I never thought I'd have the temerity) to dash off a column composed of names that almost rhyme. "It's already been done," rings in the back of my mind. ... If imitation is flattery, then I'll pour it on thick. Even if bad to verse, this is no easy trick. I console myself in a hapless sort of way: Perhaps few might be reading on this glorious day (I might not get away unpunished, still I jump into the fray). ...

Merry Christmas to the Newsoms -- Gavin & Kimberly, The City's First Twosomes ... and Gavin's sister, Hil, and their dad, Bill -- the proudest of jurists, and the latest attraction for the Balboa's tourists;

And all of the Guilfoyles and all of the Callans ... for Pat Kelley ... Joe Peck ... Marty Lindstrom & Marty Balin;

For Al Guthertz the Great ... on-the-Mark's Michelle Heston ... for Tom Wolfe at the Fairmont ... Marsha Monro at the Westin (St. Francis, of course) ... to the stentorian Norm Howard and the sound Brian Morse;

I raise a cup of cheer for Chanticleer ... and the Gay Men's Chorus ... and dear Carole Vernier (which is really pronounced "VAIR-knee-ay" so, from now on, let's keep it that way) ... Yma Sumac ... Lori Glumac -- she's such a Boulevardier;

Here's to Jeanne Baccarat and her crystalline wit ... sociable Stu Smith ... the sharp-tongued Gracie Slick ... Addison DeWitt;

Warren the Hink ... Donat (the Hank) ... friendly John Finck ... and Farley's Phil Frank;

A salute, mano-a-mano, for Ferragamo's Luigi Votano ... Brian Boitano ... David Brancaccio and Tony Soprano. ...

I offer a nip to Eugene, Dr. Hip ... for Chet Helms and Ed Guelld, a bite of my knish -- and a Hanukkah wish to Country Joe & the Fish;

Say, Rod McKuen, let's hear some Palestrina for Chuck Ashman ...
Al Hart ... the folks at the Big 4 ... and Carly Fiorina;

For Vernon Alley and Boutros Boutros Ghali -- by gosh, by gum, by golly -- Here come Sal & Mary Salma ... with Strange de Jim ... and Salvador Dali;

A farewell to Willie Brown, a mayor who's most outgoing ... Say, Dr. Harvey Caplan, your Freudian slip is showing;

To Mike & Wesla ... savvy Michele Caprario ... Tom Walton ... Dawne the Dazzler ... and Bill Lanese, one smooth impresario;

A glass of sauterne (or maybe a Tang) for good Dave O'Byrne & Mrs. Florence Fang. ... the Apostles Bellingham (Paul, James, and John) ... Father William Myers ... and Meagan Levitan;

Better make it tall for the stalwart Maggie McCall ... and Lee, Keeper of the House ... and one for Craig Newmark, mighty man with a mouse;

A cidre bouch? for Jean-Claude Persais ... Laurent Manrique ... Gary Danko ... Gerald Hirigoyen & Jean-Pierre Dubray;

A day with Melissa Perello could make even the Wiebe Twins mellow -- the Fleur's Chantal & Hubert Keller -- make for the most happy feller ... and let's not forget Nob Hill's darling doyenne, Bella;

No nabob's more natty than our own Stanlee Gatti ... and no party glows without Pamela Rose;

So let's make merry with Guy & Rose Ferri ... Joan and Michael McCourt ... the generous Fred & Terry ... and who gives more than Michael Tucker & Jill Eickenberry? Or Maurice Kanbar? Or Chuck & Donna Huggins? Or, one of a kind, Original Joe's Marie Duggan?

Hoist a coffee ice cream cone at the North Beach Cold Mine, and toast the ding-dong daddies on the Cal Street cable car line. Here's to Le Beau ... La Presse ... Le Central ... and La Folie, which is terribly nice;

May the Spirit of San Francisco always be free -- or come down in price;

For all of the names of those I hold dear, I really mean it: I wish you were here.

So, Edward the Moose, pour a little Chartreuse, for lovely Lisa Baney, my favorite chanteuse;

And here's to Herb Caen, who started this paean back when, I mean this, too, Herb: I won't do it again.

Happy Christmas and Best Wishes,

Bellingham, Bruce